How would God Introduce Himself At a Tech Conference?

As I sat in "trotro"(public transport in Ghana) coming to work this morning, I thought of how so many programmers introduced themselves at Tech conferences and wondered how God would introduce himself if He were a programmer. Some of the popular intro's at tech conferences go like...
 Hi, my name is John Doe 
I work at company X 
I created software Y 
follow me on twitter @~/dev/null

Hi my name is Jack Sparr
I wrote git.js :)
 You can see my code on github at ww.github.com/git... 
Send me a pull request if you hate something about git
   
Hi my name is Justin H. Ritch
If you have played HappyBirds, 
you have used my code :)  
The style goes on and on. 
So this is how I think God will introduce Himself. 

Hi, my name is God. 
I go by @Jehovah on twitter. follow me :) 
You can carefully go through my code on github at github.com/God/bible 
I am the creator of 
1. Air 
2. Cats (We all love cats) 
3. Mountains 
4. You (Yeah, I created you) 
If you are in this room, you are currently using code from my air project. I have also written a lot of academic papers. Notable among them are the Old Testament and New Testament. I have also worked with other programmers. Notable among them are Abraham, Jacob, Isaac,Joseph. The list goes on and on.. If you want to work on a project with me, follow my son @Jesus on twitter. Like most projects, all my projects are open source. The last time a black hat hacker by name DeVil pushed code to my air project on the lung branch and many of you suffered from asthma, and other respiratory diseases. Beware of the the DeVil. He goes by @rm-rf on twitter. Resist him. Thank you.
 Questions 
 I will allow only 3 questions 
Q.Hi, my name is Linus Roach, talk is cheap, show us the code to the air project? 
A.Drop your ego and be kind to contributors of the linux kernel Q.Hi, my name is Roberto Martini, popularly known as Uncle Bobby, Do you do Test Driven Development? 
A. TDD is for guys like you whose code always break. I am God and my code never breaks. 
Q. Hi, my name is Sato Nakamo,creator of bitcoin, Master, master, please I cannot understand the Revealation *In an Asian accent* 
A. Join the Holy Spirit Community on irc, freenode #holyspirit you will get help from there. 

**Just for laughs**

Hacking

Hackerbit is the programmer's source of inspiration, advice and the much needed motivation to embark on this self fulfilling journey of hacking.

Who is a Hacker

“There is a community a shared culture of expert programmers and networking wizards that traces its history back through decades to the first timesharing minicomputers and the earliest ARPAnet experiments. The members of this movement originated the term hacker.

Hackers built the Internet, hackers made the Unix Operating System what it is today. Hackers make the world wide web work. If you are part of this culture, if you contributed to it and other people in it know who you are and call you a hacker, you are a hacker ” Eric S. Raymonds (Renowned Hacker)

This extract from How To Become a Hacker (Interesting Read) by Eric S. Raymonds, author of Cathedral and the Bazaar explains it all.

Eric Raymonds goes on to say  “There is another group of people who loudly call themselves hackers but aren't . There are people (mainly adolescent males) who get a kick out of breaking into computers and freaking the phone system.

Real hackers call these people crackers and want nothing to do with them. Real hackers mostly think crackers are lazy, irresponsible and not very bright and object that being able to hot wire cars makes you an automotive engineer. Unfortunately, many journalists and writers have been fooled into using the word hacker to describe crackers. The basic difference is this;

Hackers build things, crackers break them”

Richard Stallman, founder of the Free Software Foundation also has an interesting piece on the origins of hacking.

What Hacker-bits aims to do

We will bring to focus the top hackers in our communities and  interview them on their profession.

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If you know a hacker who you want to be featured on Hacker-bits, please send an email to crg.mabrey@gmail.com to recommend that hacker.

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